Wednesday, May 31, 2000

Name that Decade




Link: The "unies"?
Ryan Guerra: It just makes sense.

Why?
Phonetically it sounds good: seventies, eighties, nineties, unies [pronounced you-knees]. And think of ages, numbers, teperature: "it's going to be in the lower-to-mid unies."

What have you done to spread the word?
I've been on TV, the radio and in the newspaper. I've also been a bartender.
When you were bartending, was it easy to get people to say "unies"?
Oh yeah. They love it - especially when you're giving them beer.

When did your campaign start?
In February 1999. I feel like I've been sent by God. He came down and told me, "Ryan, I'm Jesus Christ, and we're in the unies." [laughs] My girlfriend used to make fun of me: "Why the hell are you wasting your time trying to name the decade?" But I believe in it.

How much money have you spent?
About $5,000 on gas, trademarks, laminations, T-shirts and a Web site. I tried ptting a "unies" slogan on a couple of condoms: "My wiener size is in the unies." That way every guy can feel normal.

What will it take to get people to use the term?
It might take standing on a billboard for a hundred days. If I had a hundred days to kill, I'd do it. I've thought about running around naked with "unies" painted on my ass.

What's the best sentence you've heard using "the unies"?
One writer wrote, "Personally, we prefer 'the naughts.' But then again, like Jethro, we have an IQ in the unies."

Tell me about your experience with Carson Daly.
I went to MTV on a whim to tell them about the unies, give them T-shirts and get on TV. That didn't fly too well. I saw Carson Daly outside and gave him about 12 shirts. I never saw the shirts anywhere after that. They weren't that good anyway.

Would you like anyone besides Daly to promote the unies?
Tom Brokaw. What Tom Brokaw says is news. He's not trying to blow smoke up your ass. If he says "unies," I'll know I've succeeded.